Friday, July 23, 2010♥♥♥
withLove; 11:23 PM
There isnt much things in life recently.
is it so hard for us to text like normal friends?
i never get the chance to talk to him whenever i need him. -,-
i really lost the direction of my life now.
i just want to talk to me whenever im moody.
why am i in love with a guy who doesnt give a fucking care bout his friend??
HELLO, take me as a friend. please.
never ask for more than that.
is it so hard to do so?
its okay if you got crush or not, you see.
i dont really mind that.
im hoping that he will treat me as a friend.
normal friends or maybe close friends that share everything.
the eyes, the kiss, the hugs of the jerk is still so fresh in my mind. fuck.
why is it so hard to forget a pastt???
Tuesday, June 1, 2010♥♥♥
withLove; 5:31 PM
PHEI IS BACK IN TOWNNN! wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf!
withLove; 5:05 PM
Wednesday, March 17, 2010♥♥♥
withLove; 1:08 AM
time flies really fast. we had lost em for the 2nd month.
i can feel the painnn. the pain is still around us.
i dont want to forget about this.
i feel the pain. bottom of my heart. it really really hurts.
Saturday, March 6, 2010♥♥♥
withLove; 10:25 PM
time flies, i cant believe that its the 48days they left us.
i wonder why, i was so moody for the past few days. i am moody now.
tomorrow is march 7th and its their 49 days.
i dont know what to say. but im really moody.
since the accident, i couldnt cheer myself up.
this week worst.
i dont know when it started, but i know my mood got worse and worse since monday.
sudah one week..my mood is still the same. no one can cheer me up.
i cried myself to bed every night.
i cant hold back my tears..its hard..really hard..
idk what had happen to me..
i really miss him..
i dont know how to describe my miss-brendon-ness.
its like..too much..
how can i get over it?
when i was young, i read alot of news about teenagers' death. i saw alot of teenagers lost their friends. i felt sad for the friends.
so, i started to have this question in my mind.
what is feels like to lost someone around us.
i even asked my mom once, what is the friends' feelings
i cant believe that it happened to me at the age of 17.
finally i know what is the feeling.
i dont like it. I HATE IT!
I HATE IT ALOT!
oh, God. please be the first and last time. i dont want to lost any of my friends again.
i feel heartache.
no one in this house knows that im moody. I DONT LIKE TO BE MOODY.
I DONT LIKE IT.
but..i just cant control it. i just cant....
i miss you, B! i really do miss you. i dont know how describe how much i miss you but i want to let you know i miss you alot, B. alot!
i can see you smile, i can hear you jokes. but everything was a dream. only a dream.
Saturday, February 20, 2010♥♥♥
withLove; 12:56 AM
190210- a movie day with xiaokah and cousin
i went out the whole week with friends and cousin.
on the 16th feb, i meet up with elmo,chongyik, han boon, ting yik and huimin. =D
later on, xiaokah came =D
on the 17th Feb, this is the first time i hang out with giselle,simone and sean.
and i took a pic with em' . i love the kids. they are nice.
we went to redbox and sean was happy. i can see that.
see B, you got lovely siblings. and i love em'
on18th Feb, went to queens with cousin but the queue is too long so we chose to walk around.
everything happened to suddenly and yeah. i started to accept it.
Thursday, February 11, 2010♥♥♥
withLove; 11:45 PM
11th February 2010- 2 days before New Year Eve.
kids are feeling excited about celebrating CNY. teenagers cant wait for the holidays to come, adults are preparing angpaos for the children.
i heard the sound of firecrackers, i looked out from my window.
something tell me that they are happy too. im listening to the songs that they wrote for em'
this time, we should be planning together where to go, what to do and everything.
this year, 2010, my 17th year will not be a good year.
and, i will not forget about this accident.
we suppose to fight in msn at this time and not writing blog with tears.
everything had became memories. nothing but memories that we can keep it until the day we die.
i miss you, B.
i really do.
i hate the feeling of losing a friend.
a friend that tell me lame jokes, a friend that help me without any complains, a friend that is very nice, a friend that like to tease his friends but he loves em', a friend that what a friend needs.
i really miss you B.
things that you do i still remember. its like just yesterday or maybe an hour ago.
i never know that you are such a great person until the day mum told me that you left everyone of us.
i mean i know. i always know.
you are not just a great person, also a great son, a great student and of course a great friend. =)
i tried real hard to hold back my tears but i cant. whenever im happy, i will think of you.
whenever im down, i will think of you too.
your smile cheers me up all the time. be a kid up there kay?
talk to alvin when you are free, he really miss you. i know he do.
and yeah, i know you can read this. please.